Kevin here!

 11:12 PM 14 JAN 2026. Jee is on last day again, yeahhhhh!!! God supports me every year and I owe him so much for it 🙁 I know I should be given a verrrrry harsh punishment for being unproductive 1-2 weeks before JEE mains 202 5 6, but I'm still finding ways to think and do and focus on my work. Like I searched how to get addicted to productivity (like in start of 12th class).  One of the mental ways of thinking which keeps me from getting addicted to the work is my feeling that the work (study) is unlimited and I have no or very little chance of ever completing my goals as I've wasted a few months which took me farther from my goals. Long form of it is happening to my sis. She feels the same internally I know. The doubt of it every being accomplished. 

Its 6:33 pm of 7 Jan 2026. I just came from the aangan of our apartment after playing badminton with the people who play there (first time for me with them). I was reminded by my neighbour kid (5th class) that I have that GGE problem.  I'm not gonna say my real problem here, so the code for that problem is GGE. I expect my future self to understand the meaning. I don't want you to guess it, ok? so stop trying. I again got so embarrassed but had all those emotions covered with a neutral (serious) face. Oh God. I didn't expect this problem to be clear to others that nearly all people I meet must have sensed it, though only some have pointed it out coz majority understands it will be embarrassing for me. I have to do things to fix it to the extent I can. I will search for its solution on AI apps and google. I have to wake up early tomorrow, fix my wardrobe, clothes everything. I'll have to do all these things which I thought I would do after finishing syllabus till Nov or ...

 It is 1:18 am of 7th Jan 2026. I am able to understand now why building a new house and wanting to send grandpa only a little away from us is important. A few weeks ago or months ago I did not agree with the decision of building the new house just because you have to keep grandpa little way from you. It didn't make any sense to me then but now I understand why it's important and probably the best way considering our condition.  It all started when I was watching semiconductors videos of Tanuj Bansal for revising that chapter. I was going to sleep I was sleepy. First I started reading the PDF notes class notes of that chapter of TBS but I realised after reading 2 pages that I forgotten many parts of that chapter may be because it was there THEORETICAL so I started watching the videos and I thought I would skip parts and fasten the process of revising that chapter even though I'll be watching videos and for that I open YouTube which I had uploaded it the previous year, oh no...

 Nobody's there for me to play badminton when I want. Its not other peoples' fault. Why do I get so addicted to some of the things!!!! It sucks many times.