Piche chhut gaya kya mai

 Its 3:37 PM 22 Oct 2025. I would've been in some medical college if I would have given my all between 2 and 5 PM on 4th May 2025. The problem is and was that I... Leave it. 

I saw Milkman's (of winner boys) instagram profile after seeing Pratyaksh Aggarwal's and realised they are where I wanted to be at this time. I failed besides in NEET 2025, in life too. I failed to work hard. I am distracted. I could've easily solved 10-20 more questions of physics, VERY EASILY. That means I could have got a lower AIIMS or some decent medical college. I literally feel like crying and punching and slapping myself. 

During the exam I felt like If I keep solving questions I will be able score 590 or 600, but that won't be enough to get a govt medical college or just the respect I want from society considering the last years inflated cut-offs. I thought if I score that, first I won't get a govt college and will have to take drop anyways, second, relatives and people who know me or the fact that I was a NEET 2025 aspirant are gonna think that 590 was my level. 
And not just them. 
Even I would start questioning myself, that "Even after giving my 100% I could get only 600, 100 less that what I thought my 100% would be". I cried. All this I was thinking during last 30-40 mins of exam. See Milkman now, with those marks i.e. 590 he got AIIMSB, & I am here sitting in my dark home filled with negativity outside and regret inside. I thought in class 12 that we will go to college together.

You might find it funny that even while writing this, a part of me is thinking the same way I thought last year or before that, that "No problem, he got AIIMSB, you'll get AIIMSD, MAMC, etc..." I don't know if this thought is good or not. But I think it doesn't matter whether its right or wrong, but what actually matters is whether I level up in my NEET game by focusing and studying. 

I think I should stop being sad and emotional now, like Jindal tells. The two people's profile I saw, both of them were once a NEET aspirant. They were doing and thinking what I am now. But yeah both cracked NEET in their first attempt. So what? Yes I made a mistake. Everyone does at sometime. Sometimes the mistakes do get too big. But that doesn't mean you should keep punishing you forever. But you should learn from it. Every great person, makes mistake. 

Eg 1. Gojo Satoru and Geto thought they were the strongest but they still got defeated from a monkey like Toji. Thats when Gojo learnt something he couldn't before that. 
Eg 2. Alakh pandey was a normal guy not earning good. Everyone before Covid would think of him as loser or an average person. But here we are, he has crossed Srk in Net worth now. 
There are so many examples, Elon musk, Zuckerberg, Ritesh Agarwal, Modi, Vipin sharma, MS Dhoni, so many. 

Let's learn to learn from mistakes and keep working. Congratulations to Pratyaksh and Milkman. I am different. I am a different person. I'll have a different story at the end of my life to tell people. I should focus on making my story great. Who knows I might be showing this post I am writing to the people as proof of my struggling days, and to me as a thing to continue inspiring me in upcoming bad phases of life. 

That was a lot of talk, a little emotional but hopeful too.
Lets go. You go too and work and grind and make your story great. 👍💯

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Oh this social problem!

Its 6:33 pm of 7 Jan 2026. I just came from the aangan of our apartment after playing badminton with the people who play there (first time for me with them). I was reminded by my neighbour kid (5th class) that I have that GGE problem.  I'm not gonna say my real problem here, so the code for that problem is GGE. I expect my future self to understand the meaning. I don't want you to guess it, ok? so stop trying. I again got so embarrassed but had all those emotions covered with a neutral (serious) face. Oh God. I didn't expect this problem to be clear to others that nearly all people I meet must have sensed it, though only some have pointed it out coz majority understands it will be embarrassing for me. I have to do things to fix it to the extent I can. I will search for its solution on AI apps and google. I have to wake up early tomorrow, fix my wardrobe, clothes everything. I'll have to do all these things which I thought I would do after finishing syllabus till Nov or ...
Read more

List of problems with mom

 Its 12:53 pm and i know i should sleep coz tomorrow's my test in my NEET coaching but I can't stop myself from writing this. Since my sis feels bad when i tell her all problems with mom, i m sharing it here point wise clearly. 1. She abuses . Though less than dad but she does. 2. She is adamant.   She will do what she wants. Many people at many times have this stubbornness but her stubbornness even in situations that would melt hearts of other people.  3. She has no ambition , which part of the reason why she indulges into bad things. She says she wants to do big things in life, and it's a joke. She does not have any work. She prioritises kalesh over productive things. 4. She doesn't care about her family's mental health . If she would care, she would have thought a thousand times before starting fight even if the fight might be for good reason for her. Even after multiple requests she keeps on doing same thing like we are not getting affected or she does not care....
Read more

6th may 2025

 Its 6th may 25 and 8:41 am. I came to Library. Weather outside is good but inside me is bad. I am sad. I have many thoughts inside which I want to express but I won't.  My NEET 25 went verryyyy bad. I was disheartened by the time 30 minutes of exam were left. Many reasons for it. I was slow from the start because I had "its NEET" in my head so I was re-checking each answer of mine. I was trying to hurry up and knew I could be late. I also wanted to give time for OMR filling because if I make a mistake in it, i would be very sad. Now I am a dropper. cant believe it. Since the last 2 days, I have these thoughts coming in mind periodically:- "That was my chance. Why did I not give my 2000% ??? How can it go bad? How can I be dropping? It is such a shame. All that I had expected will take atleast a year more now. How would be the environment around me if I would've managed time well and able to score atleast 600? Everyone would be so happy at home including myself. ...
Read more